:(

So I just left my kids and it breaks my heart. When I walked in to the orphanage today all the kids where there, I guess there was no school, and they started screaming my name and were running up to me to give me a hug. I felt so excited, happy, loved, and like I was making a difference. Today we went to the field since it was only about 80 degrees here today. We ran around and played soccer and braided hair, and jumped on each other and just enjoyed having the company of each other. This has been such an eye opening experience for me and I cannot thank those enough who helped make it happen. This trip has had more meaning than many other things in my life and it will be unforgetable. As much as I will miss Tanzania, and as much as I thought about changing my flight and not coming home, I do look forward to seeing everyone when I get back, although I am not looking forward to the 17 degree weather...talk about a difference. I want to thank everyone for reading my blog and for all the comments. I am glad you got to share some of my amazing experience with me. It is really hard me for to find the words to write right now because I am leaving a life I have fallen in love with and do not want to leave. I have met some of the greatest people from around the world and the greatest children here. I know I have a life to get back to but this has been an experience that has changed me forever!

Last Day

Sorry I couldnt blog yesterday we had no internet again and I normally go right before dinner and it was unsafe to go into town to get on. I did not get to volunteer yesterday as I had to get everything in order for when I leave to go home today. I am so sad. It is like the children at the orphanage are my own children and I do not want to leave them. I am actually on my way to go be with my children right now for one last time. I just popped in the internet to update everyone. I leave tonight around 10 so I am pretty sad about that, but my friends that I came here with and started placement with are road tripping it to the airport with me which is an hour away so that should at least be fun. Will try to blog tonight about my last day if the internet works. If not see everyone soon!

orphange

So I cant believe that it is already almost time to leave. Time here is flying and if I was honest I really dont want to come back to America, at least not yet, there is so much left to do here. It will be weird coming home and not only because there is a 50 degree temp difference! I went back to the orphanage today though because something about those children just make me happy and make me feel like I matter. Some of the children went back to school this week so in the beginning it was just 4 children. We worked on our ABC's and numbers, and speaking english. We sang songs in swahili and english trying to get the children to relate the words since actions were also involved in the songs. It is neat to see when the child is actually learning, its almost like you can see something just click in their brain. We also had some play time with coloring books and a ball. It was too hot to take them to the field today because the children only have access to so much water during the day it is not good for them to sweet it all out. It is weird because it is opposite in America. Most children in America would love to be told that they can stay inside, but I guess we also have game devices and other things as well. The children we so upset when Mama would not let them go, so we improvised and played a ball game in the room. After a little while the other children came back from school. We have coloring and play time and story time. The children loved the stories. some were in swahili and some in English. Even though some did not understand all of the english when they saw our facial expressions change during story time they got really excited. I also helped mama to do some of the childrens laundry, which you have to scrub by hand then rinse by hand, then rinse again and then hang to dry. Even though Mama has one other helper she also has to do the cooking and everyone pretty much knows how children go through clothers, but it is a lot harder when then children only have a couple of outfits to wear and everyone has to share. It was a learning experience washing clothes and makes me value the simplicity of the washing machine which I have never really had to think of. It makes me really sad that I have to leave these wonderful children so soon, but hopefully the new volunteers who will become can pick up the pace. See everyone soon!

clinic

So I havent blogged for a couple of days. I have not had electricity. For those of you worried about my toe...it is starting to look better...knock on wood though because I am still here for a couple more days. It is crazy that I have to leave so soon to go home. I love life here and am considering coming back. I am pretty sure I will have reverse culture shock when I came home.
I went back to the clinic from the orphanage. I was in the antenatal unit. Here mothers come early in the morning to line up outside to be seen. They wait outside in line for 4 rooms. Women are called up in groups where they are weighed and then brought to another hallway to wait some more. Most women end up waiting for 5 hours to be seen. When they come for the first time every mother is given an HIV test. This is done to help reduce the transmission rate to the baby. It is estimated that the HIV rate in Tanzania is 1 in 10, but it Arusha where I am at it is estimated to be 1 in 5. After the lab test the mothers are examined. It is a pretty basic examine. The mothers are asked questions about previous children and complications and how many times she has been pregnant and the number of children still living. They feel on the stomach and estimate the due date based on what the mother says. Other than that there really are no more questions. They are told when they are supposed to come back and signs to watch for but there is a def need for increased eduation. It is hard though because there are so many women, so few rooms, doctors, nurses, and time! The nurses here do most of the education and exam unless a problem in encountered then the doctor is brought in. there are 2 to 3 women per tiny room so there is no privacy. Everyone knows everything and can see everything. There are so many needs that it is hard to put into words.

Stickers!!

So today started out a little rough. I ran my foot into a cement block...no surprise there....and I busted the front of my big toe and tore off part of the toenail. Needless to say it is less than comfortable. In America the problem would not be so bad, but here it is a different story. I not only had to put 3 bandaids on it but I also had to wrap the bandaids and the whole toe repeatedly with tape just to keep the dirt out. I also can not wear my shoe so then I had to wear a sock with a thong flip-flop, which is not the most comfortable thing. Even then that is not too bad but have to walk 3 miles to work with it on rocky roads is not the easiest thing and those 3 miles were with taking the dalla dalla. Then on the way back I had to get into the dalla dalla which is a 16 passenger van that had 22 people stuffed in it and i hit my toe again trying to climb over everyone. Even that is not too bad but I cannot get it wet with the water, which I guess is pretty easy to do considering that we never have water. I am not complaining at all, but rather just trying to show how many more precautions are required and the difficulty of having an injury in a 3rd world country.
After my rough start the day got a lot better. I decided to go back to the same orphanage today because the children looked like they just needed the love and attention My mom advised me before I went to bring stickers to the kids. At first I looked at her and was like "okay mom, stickers, that makes perfect sense," but I must say sorry mother because that was the best idea ever. I brought about 700 stickers to the orphanage with 10 children. In about 1 hour all the stickers were gone, and even the sticky part that is left after you use the stickers. The kids used them for a variety of things including fingernail coverings, earrings, necklaces, to cover there mouth and all over their bodies. It was so cute to sing. They started counting their stickers and then dancing and singing around the room. After sticker time we brought a surprise for the children. We brought a laptop with a Harry Potter movie on it. Even though the movie was in English it worked out because we are working on English with the children. They may not have understood everything but they were mesmerized by watching a movie on the computer and all the special effects and magic that was in the movie. They organized the benches in a way so that everyone could see and they sat so still during the movie, minus a few bathroom breaks. When all the magic and different scenes came on their faces looked in awe. It was amazing to them, and it was amazing for me to watch them. I wish all of you all can experience they simple joy with children. I never thought stickers would be such a big hit, and it is something so simple, but I guess if you are not used to them or if you have nothing than anything is a big hit. I am kind of sad because the weekend is coming and I wont be able to see the children for a couple of days. It is shocking how fast someone can grow on you.
I was thinking about how this trip is going to effect me when I get back home. How will I see the world we live in and all the luxuries we have? Will I complain less? Will I learn to leave the small things alone? How will I view the healthcare system? How will I be when someone complains of a headache at the hospital after witnessing all these births with no medication and no noise and no support? Will I view people and their pain the same way? Will I change my spending habbits and my view on material things? Will I even want to stay in America? I think about all these questions all the time and I do not know the answer yet. I guess it will show when I get home and I hope my trip makes a positve impact in every aspect of my life. I have seen and experienced things that I never would have imagined and have a new found respect for many things. Its crazy that my time here is almost up. I really do not want to go home at all, but I know and realize I have to. Life is just so much more rewarding when you are doing good for others because you want to, rather than always taking!

orphanage children and others at the field

Orphanage

So today was the most amazing day of my life! Today I went to an orphanage named Bethlehem. It is run by one lady "Mama" and has 10 children: Juvenille, Glory, Angelia, Wittness, Dorcus, Debora, Euilide, Abrhiam, Neehma, and Happy. The place is really run down. The children sleep two per bed. One of the rooms is right next to the chicken cage and smells terrible. There is another room used for cooking, and one for Mama, and then one about the size of storage shed that is used for learning, playing, eating, coloring, and everything!
Another volunteer and myself started out the day doing math lessons. We did counting and addition problems. moja, mbili, tatu, nne, tano, sita, saba, nane, tisa, kumi. (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10) After playing we walked about 1/2 mile to a "field" It was a giant open space of grass but was full of GIANT holes, and some rocks, but over all it served its purpose. We took 2 soccer balls with us and on the way to the field some 30 kids saw us and walked with us. When we got to the field we tried to play tag but no one really knew what it was. Since there were so many kids we played a version of soccer. Basically try to get the ball and keep it. The kids were from 1.5 years up to around 7 maybe. After we played socccer for awhile some of the bigger kids took the ball so everyone decided to chase me. They would run after me and catch me and then we would fall to the ground and everyone would pile on top of me for a minute. Then everyone would yell "get up" and we would start all over. It was amazing. I learned that there are 3 universal languages: playing, love/care, and a smile. These children live in conditions that not even the poorest in America live it yet they are still able to have fun and smile. It brought me so much joy to play with the kids. We played for about 1.5 hours before lunch and I can honestly say that was simply the BEST 1.5 hours of my life ever. These kids have made me think of life in a different way. I will never forget them. After playing we went back had "lunch" and did some coloring. It is terrible that SO many children are orphans here. IT is beyond belief the numbers. People just leave babys everyone and some of them are lucky to still be alive. Just remember when you are feeling down or see someone else down a smile can go a million miles!

TB sign outside clinic









Sign for clinic and its services









Me and Merril going to the clinic









Main room for waiting to push









Mother trying to walk off pain









the only medical supplies in delivery room









Buckets where they put used instruments









Baby warming table









Baby scale









delivery tables...yes 2 can be in the room at the same time, yes they are completely naked, yes they do not make noise, yes they must bring their own sheet to put on top









toilet









mom before delivery









instrument to hear fetal heart









baby I delivered under the warmer light









oxygen tank









HIV meds to give after birth if needed









Beds in the main room before birth...that is a rubber covering









Mother and Baby I helped deliver









The Mother Baby waiting area